4 Reasons to say No

It seems like our lives have become packed with responsibilities and chores without enough time to do everything we have to or want to. When we were young children we seemed to be happier and given the chance to go back and be a child again, most adults would jump to the opportunity. But time travel is not quite possible (yet) and therefore not our best option. What has changed since then? You probably have filled your life with responsibilities and a full schedule that leaves little time to actually enjoy your life. Overwhelming oneself is a very common phenomenon in our day and age. We just take on to much for our given 24 hours a day and end up feeling exhausted and sometimes even unhappy with the lifestyle we lead.
Of course we cannot just drop everything and act like carefree children but we can learn how to filter what really need to be done and when we should just say No. Here are some questions you should ask yourself before you take on a responsibility:

1. Do I have enough time on my hands to take on this project? If you already feel like you are working on overdrive to get through the day; It is probably not a good idea to take on anymore responsibilities.  Chances are that you will not be able to complete the task and if you do, it might be done poorly. Time management is a good reason to say NO. If you do not have the time, just say NO.

2. Am i doing this out of guilt? Is the reason you are doing something clearly because you will feel guilty for not doing so? Do others make you feel guilty when you decide to decline an offer? For instance; Have you agreed to go out even if you don't really want to just because your friend refuses to go without you? Are you feeling tired or overwhelmed but it is your day to go to the gym and you decide to go just because you know that your trainer will make you feel bad about yourself or guilty for missing a day at the gym? If the solemn reason you have decided to do something or go somewhere is do to Guilt then you will probably not enjoy the time you spend doing it and probably end up counting the minutes so you can leave.  Guilt is not a good reason to do anything so just say NO.

3. Disappointment?
We might feel like if we don't manage to do everything we would like to; that we are probably going to disappoint and let others down. Everyone is human and if someone is not able to do you a favor you shouldn't condemn that person for not doing so. Humans get tires, get sick, need time to rest, need time to sit back and enjoy life. No one has the right to judge you; and the soonest you get this in to your head the more you will start making decisions for yourself and not for others. The people who truly care for you will understand and those who don't, don't deserve your time and effort in the first place. So say NO if you are just doing something in order to gain others approval!  

4. Do you always put others needs before your own? Do you spend most of your time worrying about the well being of others rather than your own? This is a very common state of mind especially if you are a parent. Parents tend to sacrifice their own time and energy for the well being of their children; and even though this is done with good intentions they end up biting off more than they can chew. When a parent or anyone else for that matter is feeling overwhelmed it is probable that they will loose their temper more easily than usual. That they will not have the patience needed to deal with situations that arise in their day to day routine and  they will probably end up doing or saying things they regret when they are frustrated or angry. The best way to take care of others is to primarily take care of your self. If you are in good spirits you will be able to share your happiness with others but if you are always frustrated and overwhelmed than others will receive the baggage that come along with those feelings. Say NO for your own and your loved ones well being. NO is not always a negative thing!

xoxo Natasha